Personal conflict between people is completely natural and happens in every ongoing relationship.

To manage conflict effectively, we must be at least a willing communicator.

While many of us would prefer to be so in command of our thoughts and emotions that we can handle conflict immediately, most of us need a minute to sort out what we’re upset about, and figure out how we can best express it.

Let’s discuss dealing with conflict.

Dealing With Conflict

Why Does Ignoring A Conflict Make It Worse?

There are some consequences of conflict avoidance.  It can lead to resentment and frustration on both sides. The relationship becomes based on assumptions and expectations rather than communication.

It can lead to further conflict down the road, and it can also negatively affect physical intimacy in a relationship.

Why Am I So Bad At Conflict?

There are several psychological conditions that can cause someone to struggle with engaging in healthy conflict.

Adult ADHD causes impulsivity so you may rush into conflict without being able to stop yourself.

Borderline personality disorder leaves one with both impulsivity and poor emotional regulation skills.

How To Resolve Conflict With Someone Who Doesn’t Want To Talk?

Put yourself in their shoes and show that you understand it’s difficult for them. That means we need to be open, curious and calm rather than defensive, aggressive and upset.

You might say to them, “I get that you don’t want to have this conversation” or “I know this is difficult to talk about but…”

Tips for Managing Conflict

• Listen actively.
• Accept conflict. Remember that conflict is natural.
• Be a calming agent.
• Analyze the conflict.
• Agree to disagree.
• Separate the person from the problem.
• Work together.

Is It Better To Speak Up Or Stay Silent?

Speak up because others may not know what you know, so use it as a possibility to educate yourself and broaden your horizons.

Speak your mind instead of suppressing your emotions, and speak up to protect yourself and others, so you don’t regret remaining silent.

Why Do I Go Silent In Conflict?

Becoming silent is one strategy some use for resolving conflict constructively. They may have been caught off guard and might be struggling to know how to respond, but don’t assume they’re angry. You may assume something that isn’t true.

Some Ways To Resolve Conflicts

• Choose a good time.
• Plan ahead.
• Talk directly. 
• Give information.
• Show that you are listening.
• Talk it all through.

What Personality Type Avoids Conflict?

INFPs are known to be classically conflict-avoidant. (Introverted, Intuitive, Feeling, Perceiving)

They’re both sensitive and empathetic, trying their best to avoid hurt and avoid inflicting pain on others.

Their heart is their greatest strength. But they have to let others see the full extent of it, and that means speaking up for oneself.

How Do You Speak Confidently During Conflict?

• Present yourself confidently with the right body language.
• Prepare for the conversation beforehand.
• Be mindful of what you say and your delivery.
• Flexible conflict resolutions should be a part of any goal.

How Do You Avoid Conflict?

Know your own conflict style. When you have a disagreement with someone, what do you normally do?

Form connections with others and strengthen your relationships to help prevent conflict. Finally, communicate effectively and clear up any misconceptions.

What Are Some Other Ways of Resolving Conflict?

• Clarify what the issue is.
• Don’t ignore conflict.
• Bring involved parties together to talk.
• Don’t place blame.
• Remaining calm. 
• Identify a solution.
• Continue to monitor and follow up on the conflict.

Final Thoughts

If there’s no threat of physical violence, talk directly to the person with whom you have the problem, and avoid gossiping behind their back.

The first step in resolving a problem is taking the time to really listen to what the other person has to say, and listen to the other person’s point of view without becoming defensive.

Give specific feedback, explain both sides and try coming to a resolution.

Thanks for reading, please comment or follow the links.

Sources and other reading:

Bad At Dealing With Conflict

How To Fix A Broken Friendship

What Are Some Self-Defense Basics?

The Importance Of Good Communication

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